Doing Christmas well
Anyone else confused about how it got to be the middle of December? It’s been yet another whirlwind of a year and I’m aware this sensation feels to be getting more profound year on year (my teenagers tell me it’s because I’m old!).
Time Management
Time management is an issue that I think many of us struggle with all through the year, however I do think that it’s especially tricky in December! I’ve already lost count of the conversations I’ve had with people in the last four days about how they’re struggling to juggle all the competing demands of ‘the silly season’. And every single one of those conversations wasn’t really said with effervescent joy – was filled with a sense of fatigue and depletion.
Conflicting emotions
Humans are complex beings. And we are capable of experiencing all the emotional seasons in one day, sometimes even one emotion on top of another – messily coexisting in the very same moment. Laughing at something funny whilst grieving the loss of a loved one or feeling angry about one aspect of your life, whilst also feeling at peace with others. It’s like having one foot on the brake and the other on the accelerator. In the midst of this emotional spin-cycle it can feel exhausting, disorientating and really very confusing.
The things I cling to when things get tough
I think that mostly when people come to therapy, they might think that the therapist that they’re working with has ‘all their shit together’ or that maybe things don’t get difficult or overwhelming for the person they’ve come to for support. I’m here to tell you that’s most definitely NOT what it’s like.
ADHD
I have spent a lot of time over the last couple of years being asked by clients (very often women) this singular question: “do I have ADHD?” To begin with I blamed the fact that so many of my clients had downloaded TikTok during the COVID-19 lockdowns…but then I spent time doing two really important things: firstly, I really listened to what my clients were saying to me about some of the symptoms and experiences they were struggling with. And then I went into full research mode.
Perinatal mental health
For once I’m on top of the timing of events, and I happen to be writing this week’s blog to coincide with perinatal mental health week (6th – 12th November 2022). It’s going to be all about understanding what perinatal mental health is, how to get support, how to support others around you and where to go for help if you or someone you love needs it.
Addiction
As humans, we are designed to move toward pleasure and avoid pain. It’s one of those instinctual drivers that has ensured our survival thus far. There’s a fairly delicate balancing act that goes on to ensure that we remain on just the right side each of them. And in our modern-lives, rife with consumerism, with easy-access to so much that creates deep pleasure for us, is not surprising that there are not only increasing rates of addiction, but there is also a lot of attention on expanding research and new approaches to recovering from addiction.
Unpacking parts of self
This one has been brewing for quite a while, and as ever I usually get my inspiration for these weekly musings from the themes that appear to be present in my sessions with clients during the preceding week. Back in February I introduced the concept of ‘parts of self’ which is an important way of us understanding what might appear to be contradictory feelings or beliefs or reactions to things. If you missed that blog, go back and read it HERE – it’s a good summary that might be useful to read before getting too far into this one.
What is healing anyway?
I have recently completed a 12-month professional development programme called Compassionate Inquiry (CI), which was created and run by Gabor Maté with Sat Dharam. One of the things that drew me to the course was the novel approach that Gabor has with regards the training experience. Let me explain a little bit of background: whenever we do professional development and learn new modalities (types of therapy), there is always a point in the training where we, the therapists, have to practice with other therapists.
Managing your Window of Tolerance – part 2
We’ve spent the last few weeks looking at some of the basic concepts around emotional regulation and within that the idea of our ‘Window of Tolerance’. One last recap – the window of tolerance is the zone where big emotions can be processed in a healthy way, allowing us to function and react to stress, anxiety, and fear effectively. It’s the comfort-zone where we have the ability to self-soothe and self-regulate.